My dad isn't doing too well these days, and it's quite and interesting time here at the Williams' household (please don't call him saying I said he was sick and asking him if he's okay, it will seriously make him worse, though the thought is nice). I find myself in yet another position where I am not allowed to be affected by what's happening. I have to be strong and not show that I might be worried, or stressed about anything. If I mess up at all, it makes things worse. This is what happens when you're the stable one in your family and you need people to lean on you. If I miss a class, or do poorly on something, or am late for work, or I'm grumpy, or tired, all of this could just make my dad worse (I am not kidding). Therefore, all this grumpy, tired, stressed that I might be experiencing, has to just not happen right now. Honestly, I don't appreciate this position. I think it's extremely unfair, and probably very unhealthy for me (as I've been told...), but it's what has to be done right now, and it's been done in the past, and will continue to be done. Anything stressful or upsetting is saved for times when no one is around. I'm glad my family can count on me, and that me being strong for them is helpful, but can't they pick someone else?
I'm not complaining. It's just hard. But then again, I could be in my dad's position, which is obviously a million times worse. So I'll just pray for him, and put on a brave face.
Keep him in your thoughts and prayers. But again, please don't call. :)
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